Monday, May 3, 2010

Bhairvi speaks-II

It was not a nightmare…but certainly a fascinating dream…weird…
I was lost in an uninhabited building with a lot of stair rooms and huge corridors…each corridor led to another…
I was wondering there…searching something…
And for the umpteenth time I climbed down those stairs…
Found the same watchman who used to open the door of the stair room for me…
But this time he didn’t allow me to pass…he didn’t open the door…
I shouted at him but he just ignored my presence…

I was in the room…
Alone…
It was like a store room…each time I used pass through this place but never noticed anything in it…I was always in a hurry to get out of this wretched place…
Broken chairs, empty boxes, syringes and what not…
I decided to climb up the stairs…
Strangely enough, each time I was just climbing down the stairs and found myself in this room…
May be there was a way up!!!
I had just climbed a few steps when I heard a purr…
A cat was on the stairs…
Now where from a cat came here?!
I hadn’t noticed it even once…

It approached me…I stood still…
Then there were many other meows!
There were many…many of them now!!
They started clinging to me…softly pawing me…
They were all around me on the stairs…
I sat down.

They were loving me and I was loving them back…
I don’t know for how long I was there…
The bright daylight from above gradually vanished and the sparkling white light of the full moon bathed us…
Suddenly I had an uneasy feel…
The cuteness of the creatures was gone…
It was sickening now…creepy!!!
I looked into the eyes of one of them and a voice inside my head rang, “Remember me sweetie? I am back for my vengeance!!!”

I ran…I ran upstairs…I ran from the unknown…
Human mind always runs away from the unknown…
I ran into a room, a darker room…

A girl sat there…her head between her knees…
She was weeping…
Silent sobs…
Unheard…unattended…
I patted her shoulder and she raised her head…
She was me…


Now I remember…the cat…she was mine…
Oh!! Will my cursed past ever leave my trail???

19 comments:

  1. Guys this is from "Nine lives"...
    Hope you like it...

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  2. hmmmmmmmmmmmmm bro thik hai.......... but not like first one..


    kuch jyada lamba laga mujhe... and same thing.. darknes and sadness ko ek sequence me dena thik hai.. par ek hi cheej dubara ayegi to thoda ajeeb lagta hai...

    but diff hai... kosis karte rahooo

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  3. this is actually a dream sequence where she sees her past...
    she had murdered her own kitty in the stair room of their home and then went up to cry over her death...
    she had completely forgotten this incident when her dream made her remember it...

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  4. A well defined and well plotted scene. I loved the way things were going clear yet to take on your mind.
    I am waiting to have the full info on it.

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  5. thanks jayant...
    hope you will like the complete work too... :)

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  6. bahut badiya!!!!eagerly waiting 4 complete work...wish u all d best!!!!

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  7. Thanks bhai, the work has started, hope we will complete it soon... :)

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  8. liked d beginin....
    dream seq. ws gud...
    i culd picture d thngs out in my mind...
    hope d whole wrk wuld b as thrillin....

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  9. Thanks Ami...:) :)
    nice to hear from you...:D

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  10. Its really good and extremely mind blowing.
    Hope and wish that u'll always do u best..
    Never take any criticism lyk a stoppage but jump highest ovr the hurdles..

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  11. thanks yasa...i'll keep that in mind...:)

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  12. greeping narration.....want more complex and postmrtm of imotions :P

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  13. thanks bhai...
    next part is darker...:D

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  14. I guess the dream sequence should wait, let the part I be epilogue, then change the scene do something and get back to it, the plot is nice and mind blowing and the whole portion can be divided over the complete story-- its just a suggestion , no offence :)

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  15. thanks for the suggestion bhai...
    we were also planning it...
    thanks again for being with us...:) :)

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  16. Thanks bhai...hope everything turns out well...

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  17. well compiled !!
    da sequence f events keeps 1 glued 2 da story till da very end
    hope da othr parts r as gud
    on da contrary 2 a few, i lykd dis part dan da 1st 1

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  18. Hey,thanks abhi...
    the pages are also shaping up good,i am pretty excited to the core about the project...:)

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